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Marriages
Marriage is an important ceremony in
Himachal.
The parents are also the closer
elders relatives begin to look around for suitable matches as soon as the child
is old enough. Sometimes a middleman is used as a match-maker known as Roovary,
Dhamu or Mazomi. He finds out the details about the social and financial
standing of the family and the final decision is taken on the basis of the
horoscopes. Matches in the same Gotra are not considered very good. When the
match is settled the ritual gift called Tika is sent. The groom and his family
are invited to tea. On this occasion ritual songs are sung and sweets are
distributed. In the tribal areas both the parties exchange Chhang (rice wine)
and close relatives are invited to participate in the ceremony. In some areas
during the various festivals, gifts of jewellery and clothes are sent to the
betrothed. In Kinnaur this system is known as Chharmi Nata, elsewhere it is
known as sending the Tihar.
 The date for the wedding is set in consultation with the priest. In some
places the permission of the deities is also sought. Customarily all the
preparations for the wedding are to be kept a secret from the bride. In Kinnaur
as the wedding party approaches the house, the bride and her friends begin to
wail and weep.
Marriage customs differ from place to place in
Himachal.
The bride and the
groom are carried in palanquins except in the Lahaul area. The girl touches her
father's feet at the time of her departure. People in Kinnaur follow a
matriarchal system where all the brothers share a wife and if there are more
than six brothers then another may be brought in. All the brothers are looked
upon as common fathers to the children. The eldest is known as Teg Bawal and the
youngest as Gota Bawal.
A maid (barber's wife or
Pachekan) accompanies the bride temporarily from her
father's house to help her settle down in the midst of her new family. In Lahaul
when the groom departs with the bride the girl friends of the bride block
his path till the groom promises them that he will take good care of their dear
friend.
The day the bride enters the new household, a special Havan is performed
under the guidance of the family priest. The bride and the groom cook kheer
(rice pudding) and it is served to all the assembled relatives who bless them.
At the time of Feroni (the ritual return of the bride after her first visit from
her father's house-also known as Dwiragaman) the bride and groom are welcomed
with great joy and fed sweets and butter.
Wedding
At the time of the wedding, the Suhagi jewellery (denoting a girls married
status) is presented by the Mama and the rest is given by the parents of the
bride and the groom. The groom's family displays their gifts (Barasuhi) to the
bride, to all assembled, so that they may judge their financial status. Among
the poorer sections, the gifts and the cash to be given to the bride by her
family at the time of the wedding are fixed in advance.
In the plains, the bride's brother presents the groom with a 'dhoti' and a
ring and ushers him to the place where the marriage ceremony is to take place.
In the areas of Kinnaur the bride's father presents the groom with a white
turban and ties a sword or a dagger to his waist band to indicate the start of
the ceremonies. All this time wine cups are also presented to both the
match-maker and the groom. When the marriage party returns with the bride it is
greeted by the fellow villagers holding torches. Goats are sacrificed and
special rituals are performed to ward off evil spirits and ghosts.
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